The Halloween Face!

Okay, I have another story to tell! :) This one happened to me about a month ago (way before my "poop" story)! LOLOLOL!!!! And, yes, this story is funny to one degree, but so very sad to another! After it happened, I laughed due to the "I can't believe that just happened to me" moment, but a few minutes later, I was crying in Target, due to the "how awful how that just happened" and "I will never complain again!" Soooooo, have I got your curiosity peeked??!! Maybe, I should just wait and tell ya later!!! lol! Just kidding! Here goes:

Mark, the boys and I were at the Stringtown Wal-Mart doing a little shopping. It was about a week before Halloween, so keep that in mind. I had gotten the Joel Osteen book (a gift from my mom) around that same time and just started reading it. I had also watched Joel Osteen on Larry King Live and was real impressed w/him and what he had to say! Joel Osteen is a famous minister in Houston and has written two motivational books about how to improve your life! I just happen to really like him! This fact is important later on in my story! :) Sooooo, we are at Wal-Mart and we pay and are on our way out the door. Now, as you all know, way too often, there is someone sitting out front of Wal-Mart selling things. Usually they are selling candy bars or something little like that! I usually just walk right on by these people or sometimes I, at least, say "no, thank you." Well, this day was no different. As we walk out, there sits a young lady selling what looks like little candy bars. So, after reading some of Joel's book, I figured it might be nice to stop and smile and say hello and see what she was selling and why. I don't remember for sure, but I think it was candy bars for a church! To tell the story correctly, I have to mention two things: 1)it was getting dark out by this point and 2)the young woman was black (I don't want to be a Don Imus). But, the point that she was black may explain better why this happened to me! Soooo, Mark and the boys walk out in front of me and I follow behind. Oh, yeah, another detail I left out is that Mark had gotten the car and pulled up front to get the kids and I. Soooooo, I follow behind my family and see this young woman. Sooooo, I stop and smile and say hi. I ask her how much the candy bars are and she says it is donation only and you get a piece of candy! Mark is putting Jacob in the car and I holler to him to get some money (I'm broke). :) As I am waiting for Mark to get the money, I decide to make some "small talk" with the young lady! Sooooo, I look her straight in the eye (b/c I am thinking how soooo many people get overlooked and ignored these days). I am really trying to make an "extra" effort to be "extra" friendly (it is all Joel's fault). Personally, I think I am VERY FRIENDLY on any given day. I always try to smile and notice people in general b/c you never know who might need it. One smile to one person may make their day and you may never realize it! Okay, I am getting off track here. Sooooo, I look her right in the eye and I can't help but notice that her face is all done up!!!! With make-up that is! It looked like she had totally decorated her face, sort of like a kitty cat! I am assuming since it is so close to Halloween that that is what she did! W/out missing a beat (or using my head obviously), I say to her, "Oh, You Decorated Your Face For Halloween To Sell Candy, HUH!!!!!" Well, I'm sure you can guess what happened next!!!! NO, SHE HAD NOT DECORATED HER FACE FOR HALLOWEEN!!!!!! She says so very politely that "no, my face just looks like this!" I COULD HAVE DIED!!!!!!! I was 100% caught off guard and had NO IDEA what to say now!!!!! I didn't want to just stand there and say nothing - and running off, like I wanted too, didn't seem to be the right choice, either! The nice young woman does say to me (as I am standing there feeling awful) that I was not the first person to think that! Sooooo, after standing there for what felt like FOREVER, I finally say, "Were you born this way?" Now, some of you might think this is the 2nd embarassing thing for me to say to her. I disagree. After thinking she had Halloween make-up on and finding out that was not the case, I felt like it was okay to inquire! I have heard numerous times that disabled people would rather be asked about their disability rather than stared at! Soooo, I just figured that this might be true in this case as well. Plus, in the few moments (that felt like yrs.) that I stood there thinking of what to say next.........I prayed and asked God what to do next. I felt like these were the words that came to me! Soooo, I ask if she was born this way. She says she was, but it was much smaller when she was little, but grew throughout the years! By this point, I am completely blank on what to say next, so I simply say "I'm sorry!" By this point, Mark had the kids in the car. I get some money from him and give it to the girl. I tell the girl "bye" and I get in the car and we drive off! Mark looks at me and says "I know you feel bad right now, but I am just glad it was you and not me!" I start laughing b/c it is SO AWFUL what happened!!!! You either laugh or cry! I laughed! Not at the girl, no, but at me!!!! How could this happen??!! I felt so bad!!!! Sooooo, we drive over to the new Target in Grove City (which most of you know isn't far) and park and go in the store. As we are getting the cart, I just started walking and crying!!!! I still felt soooo bad. But, the funny part of what happened to me, was over! It wasn't funny, not really! This girl has to live with her face looking like it is decorated for Halloween!!!!! I don't know if anyone knows this, but I have rosacea! It is basically reddening of the face! My cheeks will, often times, be much more red than they should be. I have cream from the dermatologist that I put on it, but sometimes I am self-conscience of it! Standing there in Target, thinking of this young woman, I told Mark that I would never complain of my rosacea again! Soooo, I laughed and cried and felt bad for a whole week! I have told people my story and everyone has been so sweet to me! Most people suggest that I was put in this woman's path that day for a reason! Maybe! I hope so! I will never know! I do feel like she was put in MY life that day for a reason! :) Oh, I wanted to point out why I mentioned that she was black! :) She had a hoody on and in the dark, since she already had a dark complexion, I just thought it might help explain what happened. I might have been able to tell better (on a white person) that it wasn't make-up. Maybe, maybe not, but I felt it was worth mentioning! :)
Soooo, for the whole following week, I kept saying that I was going to email Joel Osteen!!!!! This was all his fault, of course! If it wasn't for him, I would have just walked right on by or, at the most, just said hello, and carried on my way!!!! Joel is to blame for this! :) I never did email him, but I still wonder what he would say if I did! :) I hope that it is true and there is more to this story than meets the eye! I will probably never know, but I hope it is true! In the meantime, take my advice, and NEVER, EVER ask a woman about her make-up!!!!!! LOL!!!! :))

Oops! I Crapped My Pants!!!

LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!! ROFL!!!!!!!! By reading the title, you may have an idea of what I am about to write! If anyone reading this is squeamish in any way, I suggest you stop reading now!!!!! LOLOLOLOL! I must say, tho, that I think I am pretty brave to tell my story! It is awful, but at the same time, one of the funniest things to tell!!!! I laugh everytime I think about it!!!! :) Something this funny just has to be passed on!!!! I hope anyone reading about this finds it more funny instead of gross! Sooooooo, here goes:

Let me first start by asking, have any of you heard that Justin Timberlake song, "What Goes Around Comes Back Around!" Well, if not, you should really look it up online and listen to some of the lyrics, b/c after what happened to me, I keep singing the chorus! :)) It isn't like I didn't already know that, "what goes around comes back around!" Of course, I know that! I try to live by that! Do under others as you would have others do unto you! Right?! I pretty much have tried to live my life in a very caring manner! I pride myself on being caring and nice and kind to others! But..........I certainly have had my share of "laughing" at others expense!!!!! Let's not forget Emjaye's skunk incident! It is a perfect example b/c I always laugh myself sick EVERY time I think of it!!!!!!! :)) Soooooo, back to my story! I don't know if ya'll know this, but I go walking w/my very good friend, Shadia, most every night. We usually don't even go till nine o'clock or later. We get the kids in bed and then off we go! I haven't lost a ton of weight by walking, but I really do feel much better both physically and emotionally! I have gotten a couple compliments that I've lost a "little" bit of weight so it is incentive to keep going! Soooooo, Wednesday night Shadia calls and asks if I am ready to go! We had a late dinner (well, we ate at 7:00) and it was now 9:30, so I was ready to go! We walk anywhere from a mile and a half to two miles, so it can feel pretty far sometimes! Sooooo, we get going and everything is fine. We got at least a mile when, all of a sudden, I get a HORRIBLE stomachache!!!!! You know the kind I'm talking about!!!!! It stopped me in my tracks!!!! I felt like I was gonna have to go (poop, that is) right then and there!!!!! I told Shadia I might not be able to keep going! I might have to turn back! My house was down the street! Would I even make it back home??!! I scanned the homes around me for anyone I might know so I could run to their house if needed! I was NOT to modest at this point in time to care! I needed a toilet and I needed one fast!!!!!!! There wasn't anyone that I knew in this particular section! Awful feeling (physically and emotionally)!!! But.........my stomach made a loud noise and whatever it was seemed to pass! Shadia suggested we just go to the end of the street and turn around and come back since I wasn't feeling well. Sounded like a good plan (tho my stomach felt better, that feeling of "it might come back" was scary)! And............you guessed it, it came back!!!!! We got to the end of the street and turned around to come back. As we are walking back (my house is at the other end, so this is good) my stomachache comes back! Whatever I had WAS NOT WAITING!!!!! I told Shadia I might have to run and leave her behind! She understood! I think that was the worst part! I DID NOT WANT TO CRAP MY PANTS IN FRONT OF SHADIA!!!!! How mortifying would that be??!! Crapping my pants wouldn't be the worst part! The worst part would be - how do I say it gently - oh, well, I'll just say it -------- the smell!!!!! Can you imagine???!!!! I DID NOT WANT THAT TO HAPPEN IN FRONT OF SHADIA!!!! So............I get about four houses from mine and I can't take it anymore! It is coming and I am trying my darndest to hold it in. But, this is not "normal" poop, oh no! We have all been there. When diarrhea wants to come, there is no holding it back!!!! Sooooo, I tell Shadia I gotta run! I take off and make it to my porch! I run up the stairs (there is only two steps) and WHOMP! THERE IT IS!!!!!!! RIGHT IN MY PANTS!!!!!! At this point I have given in! As awful as it is, I can still find a positive! Aren't I special??!! The positive is that it didn't happen in front of Shadia!!!!! I had run off and left her and it was a good thing! As awful as the feeling of "crapping your pants" is - at least I had made it home! I might not have made it to the toilet, but at least, I was home!!!!! Sooooooo, I come inside and the kids are in bed and Mark had gone to bed early, too (he had a headache). I take off my gloves and attempt to take off my coat! More "crap" is on the way! I had only made it thru the first round. There was more to come!!!!! Well, can you believe, my coat zipper got stuck!!!!!!! Oh, yeah, that's right!!!!!! What a perfect time for my zipper to get stuck!!!!! Soooooo, as I am standing there trying to get my coat off, round two happens in my pants AGAIN!!!!!! ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know it is gross, but oh, sooooo funny!!!!! Well, as it turns out, I finally got my zipper undone and get to the toilet!!!! Man, a toilet never looked soooo good!!!!! (Although, there wasn't much I needed the toilet for now, tho). I mean, come on, I had already done my business in my pants! But the toilet did help in the cleanup area! Let's just say, I had to sit in the tub for awhile as well!!!!! And........I threw away the clothes I was wearing, too! I probably could have gotten them clean, but #1 UGH!!!!!!! And #2 I would always know what happened in them! That thought alone was worth throwing them away!!!!!!
Soooooo, what is the moral of this story????!!!! Why am I passing it along????!!!! The moral is: like Justin's song, what goes around DOES come back around!!!! So, be careful, my blogger friends!!!!! And I am passing it along: b/c although "what goes around comes back around" - that is true - but this story IS FUUUUNNNNY!!!!!! You can't help but laugh!!!!! I couldn't NOT TELL!!!!!! Soooo, I apologize if anyone thinks it is NOT funny! Maybe I have a sick sense of humor! But, I can't help it, I think it is funny!!!!!! I have laughed at sooooo many others who this has happened too and now it caught up w/me!!!! Soooo, the Justin Timberlake song now has new meaning to me!!!!! Everytime I hear it, I will think of what happened to me!!!!! LOLOLOL!!!!!! If anything, I hope I brought out a chuckle or made someone smile by telling my story! :) Now, I just have to make sure I don't get stopped by any skunks!!!!!!! :))))

Where Has The Time Gone???

Hi there, fellow bloggers! It seems like forever since I have blogged!!!! I guess it HAS been forever!!!! I just don't know where the time goes! It seems like I blink and another day has passed! Halloween has come and gone and it will be Thanksgiving in TWO WEEKS! How are we supposed to get our Halloween decorations down, the Thanksgiving ones up, and then Thanksgiving stuff back down and Christmas decor up!!!! I don't know about you guys, but it is feeling a little crazy to me! LOL! :) I would rather be busy, tho, and have things to do instead of sittting around being bored! So...........on that note, I am NOT complaining, just merely "asking" how to do it all!!! :)
Soooooo, I have had mostly good things going on the past month! Jackson is doing good in school (just had a teacher conference tonight). I really like his teacher. I have, in fact, liked ALL of Jack's teachers! I feel spoiled in a way, but that is a good thing, huh?! :) Jacob is liking preschool and doing good there, too! And, again, what good teachers we are blessed with!!! :) Mark and I got to take the preschool pics last week! It was soooo much fun taking the kids' pictures!!!! The best, I must say, was the three yr. old class picture! There was NO WAY they were all going to sit still and pose! We finally gave up and just started snapping and let the kids sit and stand kinda wherever! The picture is hilarious, but I love it 'cause it is real! The individual pics came out really good and I am so happy about that! We got a lot of compliments and that always makes you feel good! So, be prepared, 'cause I will probably "post" a couple for you all to see! :)
I am still walking every evening with one of my bestest friends around! I really do look forward to that walk every night! We usually don't even go until nine at night or, sometimes, even later! But, most nights, I am ready to go! I haven't lost a ton of weight, but I do feel so much better in general.
Oh, the big news is that my brother will probably be moving to Grove City!!!!! Yippee! It will be soooo nice to have him much closer! :)) He will probably be sick of me real quick, but I will loooove having him closer! He came over a couple of weeks ago and taught me a new recipe! It was soooo good! Who would think it, but he is REALLY a good cook!!!! I keep asking him to write me out some recipes or, better yet, teach me some more meals! He came over and actually prepared it and everything! I had to take notes to remember it all! It was funny! LOLOLOL!!!!! :)
At this point in time, I am starting to think about Christmas pictures!!!! WooHoo! That is always so much fun for me! :)
Okay, well, "Greys" is on, so I gotta run! With the writers strike, it may be awhile before I get to watch it again! :) But.......stay tuned 'cause I have a funny, yet sad story to blog this weekend!
Till then........peace out!!!!! :)