Happy 6th Birthday, Jacob!!!

I couldn't let the day end w/out wishing my 2nd son, Jacob, a very "Happy 6th Birthday!!!" Not only is he my "2nd son," but he is also my "baby!!!" :)) He has grown soooo, soooo much in the past year and I am soooo proud of him!!! He started kindergarten and gets on the bus and rides to school and does all the "big kid" things that "big kids" do! :))

Happy Birthday, Jacob (aka Mario)!!!! I love you!!!!

Love,

Mommy (aka Peach)

Jackson's 11 Yr. Pics!!!

Just wanted to post some of Jackson's "11th Birthday" pics!!! His b-day was Feb. 6th, but the weather is always so yucky then, soooooooooo we wait!!! lol!!! :) I know we could take some indoor pics if we wanted to, but we never get around to doing it. By the time we are ready...............................VOILA, the weather is better, too!!!! :) These are just a few that we took and........................the weather didn't really cooperate, either. It was VERY windy which made it difficult to get a good pic. Plus, Jack just had his hair cut a couple of wks. ago and it is ALREADY long again!!! It was hard getting his hair to cooperate also. lol!!!! :)) I am just happy we got a few pics that we can use! :)) Jack is such a great kid and I am sooooo proud of him. He is playing the piano and has been on honor roll all year (and this has been a HARD year {schoolwise} if I do say so myself)!!! He started a new school (grades k-4 are in a different building and he is now in 5th). The 5th graders go to a new school and they also go from one main teacher (not including art, music and gym) to "3" main teachers "plus" art, music and gym! It was a BIG transition and very different from what we were used too! Jack seems to glide more easily thru things like this (much more easily than his mama ever did). I truly am VERY proud of him and the future man he is becoming! I am thrilled to be a part of it and will always be his biggest cheerleader!!!!!

I LOVE YOU, JACKSON - my firstborn!!!!!!

Love, Mom

Comings and Goings

Man, I don't even know where to start. Don't worry, this isn't a bad post or anything; in fact, it is quite the opposite. :) I just don't know where to begin actually. :) Okay, let's see: I have had the privilege of meeting up w/some very "old" friends of mine. By "old" I mean that I have known them for YEARS!!!!! We have had some wonderful experiences and LOTS of FUN times!!!!! We go back..............waaaaaaay back!!!! We have kept in touch over the years, but at times, we lose touch for several yrs. at a time as well. Sooooo, in the last few months, we have "met back up" via facebook (gotta love it) and I have enjoyed their company immensely (we have gone to lunch and had a day-long shopping trip, too). It has gotten me to thinking, tho, about the many people who come and go throughout our lives! When you are at different points in your life and are close w/a person (persons), you aren't really thinking that "someday" they might not be a part of your life any longer. Let's face it - we lose touch w/MANY people who once mattered a great deal to us! I don't know about you, but I have times when I think of these people and wonder about them (What are they doing? What did they become? Are they happy? Do they ever think of me?). I am realizing how lucky I am to have had sooooo many good people in my life through the years!!!! I would be lying, tho, if I didn't admit, that it also makes me sad! I want to go back in time and tell them how much I love them!!!! Hug them at every opportunity!!!!! Let them know they were special to me!!!! I wonder what kind of friend I was to them. I mean, I think I was good, but....................WAS I?????? Could I have been better???? Did I make an impression on their life the way they did mine?? Soooo, I guess what I am trying to say is.................. I am lucky to have reconnected w/my "old" friends this past month!!! I am VERY thankful they have come back into my life!!! I missed them.......................a LOT!!!!!!!!! :)) But.............what about all the others? I know that many of them (most of them, probably) will simply be.......................a memory........................and that is fine! I am lucky to have such good memories of such wonderful people I have been honored to know! I am wondering, tho, if you "could" contact a dear "old" friend, would you??? If you had the opportunity, what would you do? Would you want to "be" contacted? Or....................should some things stay just that..................a memory?! I only ask b/c, I am sure, people don't even know the impact they have had on a life!!!! They couldn't know b/c even "we" don't know it at the time!!!!! "I" certainly didn't realize it - that is for sure!!!!
I guess a good lesson here would be......................to learn from this! Start treating the people in my life NOW as if they might not be there tomorrow! Now, don't read me wrong, I don't mean be all OCD about it. lol!!!! I just mean to treat them good! Don't be afraid to say "I love you!" Put simply.................just care.................and.................. be aware! People come and go throughout so many phases of our lives! Be aware of the good friends you have surrounding you today!!!!!! :)) I believe God gives us friends, at certain times, for a reason! And, then, some of these friends move on, to someone else who needs them more!
So, do me a favor, and whenever you think of an old friend, stop and say a prayer for them!!!! First, give thanks for them being a part of your life at one time, and then, say a prayer for their live now!!!! That is what I try and do and it helps b/c many of them......................... I MISS!!!!! I wish I knew then..............what I know now!!!! Maybe...............that's just life!!!!

I'm just feeling sad and I don't know why! I'm not even talking about death, either. Just old friends who I miss! :)) I wish I could tell them!!!! Maybe I'm just getting old!!!!! :)) lol!!!!!

I think I'm gonna end for now and ponder my thoughts!!!! hahaha
Have a good week!
Love, Cissa

P.S. After a little bit of pondering, I am realizing that a great song by Kenny Chesney may just "sum up" what I am feeling! :)) It's called, "I Go Back" and it is very good! Soooo, maybe, Cissa is just "going back" and remembering all my many "good" times!!!! Like I said, I am LUCKY to have LOTS of them!!!!! Here's to MANY MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cheers!!!!!! :)))

Happy St. Patricks Day!!!

Have a great day!!! :)
Love, Cissa

Cissa's Sick Kiddos!! :(

Cissa has not ONE, but TWO sick little ones!!! Jacob got sick on Monday (fine one minute, sick the next) and Jack was sent home from school on Wednesday! Jake is better (still coughing and cold), but Jack had a high fever of 104 today (which is Friday)!!! It has been a LONG, HARD week for all of us!!! I haven't left the house the ENTIRE week!!!! I am keeping positive by being thankful that "I" am well and that "Mark" is well, too! Things can only go UP HILL from here! lol!!! :)
Say a prayer we get all of Jack's homework done this weekend! They sure assign a LOT, especially after you've been sick! Who feels like doing homework?? Oh well. That will get done, too! Postive thinking, Cissa!!!! :))

Potter Boots :)

Now..........................................................................................................this is the life!!!! :)
I am trying my best to learn to relax and enjoy the simple things!!!! I am taking lessons from my cat!!! lol!!!!
Have a good weekend!
Love, Cissa

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JACKSON 2009

This post is a couple of days behind, but I couldn't let the weekend go by w/out wishing Jackson, my first-born, a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!! He turned eleven on Friday (Feb. 6th). I thought last year was hard when he turned ten!!! I have had a year to get used to him being a "double digit," but I am learning that as each day passes, it doesn't get any easier. He is growing up and I am watching him turn into a man right before my very eyes!!!! It is soooo bittersweet!!! On one hand, I am so happy to be his mother and be a part of it and I can't wait to see what he becomes in life! I see so many possibilities! He has the world at his fingertips! But..........on the other side, I am still somewhat sad (as last year), b/c each step forward that he takes, I am left behind a little more! That may sound selfish, and I don't mean it to, I just see my baby growing and............selfish or not, a part of me would like him to stay my little boy FOREVER!!!!! :))

I want him to know how very, very proud of him I am!!!! He is such a great kid and I am proud to be his mom!!!!

Happy Birthday, Jackson!!!!

Love Ya Lots!!!!

Enjoy the pics! We snapped these on the porch on Friday (his real b-day). :))

Winter Pics 2009

Wow!!! I finally got my "Winter 2009" pictures posted!!!! :) Miranda and I got to go "picture taking" on Friday and had a wonderful time (although some people would probably call us "crazy"). lol!!! It was very cold and we headed out onto some very snowy roads, but it was all worth it. We had a great time and got some really cool pics to show for it!!!! :) I had my heart set on getting a snowy "horse" pic and my wish came true! At our very last stop, we found some horses and, not only did I get my pics, I made friends w/one, too! He was such a sweet horse and seemed to understand what I was saying! I am not a snow person by any means, but I certainly got to see some beauty in it thru my lens!!! :)

Thanks, Miranda, for going w/me and sharing my passion for photography! It was such a fun time! I can't wait for our next trip for some "spring" pics!!! :)

Okay, it is about time for me to call it a day. We helped my cousin move this weekend and we are exhausted!

Have a good week!

Love, Cissa

Snow Days 2009

I think it is has been quite a while since I last blogged! :) The good news is that I am feeling MUCH better! I am not 100% back to myself, but I would say I am 80% better than I was! This is good news!!! Thank you all for your prayers!!!! It really helps knowing that I have so many friends who care! :) I have good days, but I also have bad "moments," but I am getting through the hard times. I am lucky b/c I am surrounded by people who care about me. I am also lucky that there is medicine that helps TREMENDOUSLY when you get to the point that I was. I really hated going on meds. (been there done that in the past), but I knew it was the right thing. There was no way I was getting past this "episode" w/out involving some medicine. I also feel lucky to have found a dr. who is letting ME decide what amount I want to take. With my history, he knows that I know what I am doing. I have had "not so good" drs. in the past (one had me on so high a dose it was insane - I was a zombie and he wouldn't listen or hear what I was saying - I didn't need such a high dose) soooooo, it is sooooo nice to have one I like! My mom came w/me and she liked him, too! Thanks again to everyone for praying!!!! :))

We have gotten soooo much snow and I finally got to take a couple of pics!!! It got me itching to take more, so I get to go and take some more tomorrow!!! I am so excited. I am realizing that I need to do more things that are fun for ME!!! Sounds selfish, but it is true! My life revolves around my kids, and even tho that is great and how it should be, I can't forget about Cissa! Soooo, taking pics tomorrow is all about me!!! I should be home cleaning and doing laundry, but all of that can wait. Cissa gets to go and have some fun!!! Oh, and did I mention that I get to go w/a fellow photographer who happens to be a great friend?! That is the best part! :)) Did I mention how excited I am??!! :))

Have a good weekend!

Love, Cissa

Still In Need Of Prayer!

I haven't been blogging lately and I apologize for that! I miss it b/c it can definately be an outlet, but also a wonderful way to keep in touch w/others! My biggest issue right now is still obsessing!!! I have been on my medicine for two weeks now and for the most part, I am doing MUCH better! But........there is always a but, huh?.................I am still not well!!! I have this crazy obsession that I am hurting or going to hurt my eyes!!! I know it sounds crazy! I feel soooo embarrassed to even be sharing it! At this point, I feel I MUST share it and get it out in the open! I am afraid to touch my eyelashes which makes it VERY hard to wash or clean your eyes! I tell myself that people who wear make-up (I haven't worn any in yrs. due to dry eyes), but people who do wear it, have to clean it off............and that involves rubbing and cleaning all around your eyes! I am sooooo afraid I am going to harm myself in some way! It definately affects my quality of life! I am just hoping and praying that the meds. will continue working even more in another week or so. Meds. take time to get in your system and it has only been two weeks. I AM doing better during the day. It is the mornings that are rough for me. I have had dreams about poking my eyes and then, I wake up, and can't tell if it was real or a dream. This is when the obsessive thoughts begin. Did I poke myself for real or was it a dream?? I have been to the eye dr. twice in the last month. I cannot keep going. Everything is always fine and I feel great when I leave the office, but.........w/in a day or two, I am still obsessing!
Please don't think I am some lunatic! I'm not crazy, just a little unwell right now. I beg you to pray for me b/c my kids need a mom who can function and take care of them properly. I went on meds. a couple of yrs. ago for this same thing and got better, so I know there is hope, but right now, it is early in the morning, and I had what I "think" was a dream of poking myself, and it is making me not know truth from fiction. I wake up and don't know what really happened b/c dreams can feel so real, ya know! Maybe I will start some therapy. I have done that before as well.
Mornings are my absolute hardest right now. It is quiet and I am left alone w/my thoughts which are obsessive!!!
Pray for me and THANK YOU for caring about me!!!!! This is hard and very personal to share, but I felt compelled to share it anyway. I feel very isolated and alone during these times.

I will try and update more often to keep everyone updated.
Thanks again! :)
Love you all,
Cissa

Hard to Admit, But Truthful

It has been a while since I have posted. The reason is, mostly, due to simply being busy. With the Christmas break (my husband was off, too), things just seemed more crazy around here. It might have something to do w/the fact that we are still working on remodeling our basement (that whole area is in shambles) and..............we have been painting other rooms in the house as well. Once I painted one room, it was a downward spiral where several other rooms needed painted to match better. I have to say, the colors we had originally weren't my faves, anyway, so I am happy to be painting in colors that suit me more! :) I am not a "natural" at picking colors, tho. I know what I like for one room, but trying to see the "big picture" can be overwhelming!!!! But...........we are getting there. I am trying very hard to take it one day at a time. It will all get done. There really is no rush. Sometimes the longer you wait for something, the more it means when it is finally there!!! I am hoping to be "there" by summer (although that only means we will be on to "new" projects like painting the outside of the house)! lol!!! :)
I also have been having a really hard week mentally. It started last Sunday (28th) and came out of nowhere. I was fine one minute and having a breakdown the next. I really don't know what brings it on, but I have these spells sometimes. I usually feel better within a day or two and life goes on. But.............this day..................that didn't happen. As each day went by, I kept thinking, hoping I would feel better. Never did happen. In fact, I seemed to get worse! Soooo, long story short, I got the name of a good dr. and got an appt. ASAP!!!! (Doesn't it usually take a LONG time to get in as a new patient??). I know God is watching over me b/c I called the office on Friday and got an appt. for today (Tuesday). That never happens!!! Soooo, I am going back on some medicine to help me through these obsessive times. It is so hard when you know you are thinking crazy things, but you can't control any of it! The crazy part kinda takes over any rational thoughts you once had. Plus, I need to be the best mom I can be to my kids!!! This medicine will help me find my way back home and find the Cissa I really am!!! I haven't been Cissa for over a week now and I can't wait to see her soon!!!
Please say a prayer for me! The mornings and the evenings are the hardest right now for me! If you think of me, please say a prayer. I would appreciate it so very much!!!!! :))
Have a good week!
Love, Cissa